Single In The City 4: The Test

A few weeks back I decided to embark on a fast, hoping that my sacrifice would open the door for God to reveal things about MYSELF that I may not be aware of.  Over the course of four days I prayed intensely, praised His name radically, and poured out my heart in an effort to find out about the real me.  During that time God showed me a few surface characteristics but the real discovery was yet to come.

Days after I returned to my regular scheduled eating routine, I received a friend request from a person I had pushed to the wayside years ago.  I received a simple “Hello” from a man that I had written off the day he broke my heart and kept it moving to the next chick.  This man that I had not seen or heard from in years managed to find me on this social networking site and instantly I remembered ALL the bad things that transpired between us when we were younger.  However, something inside of me told me to be cordial and accept the friend request. In reality, I really just wanted him to look at my pictures and know that I was the best thing he NEVER had!  Much to my surprise it was actually quite refreshing talking to him again; so much that I agreed to meet with him during my upcoming trip to Chicago.

“On the contrary: If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.  In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” (Romans 12:20 NIV) I was not aware of this man’s intent at that time but I was determined to be obedient to the word of God.  BUT…when I laid eyes on him the first thing I thought to do was re-hash all the drama to get closure for myself.  I tried to stop but the questions and sarcasm kept slipping out.  The crazy thing is he just wanted to apologize for everything and of course see if he still had a chance. NOT!

One of my best friends told me to pray prior to this reunion; luckily, I took her advice because what God had to say was astounding. “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” (Mark 11:25-NIV) I dated this guy as a teen and I never would have thought that I was STILL upset with him at 25.  Instead of me dealing with the situation back then I decided to just change my number and never look back. Although that seemed to ease my heartache, I would have never imagined that it put a wedge between me and my true love- Jesus.  I had convinced myself that I forgave him when I cut off contact but clearly my emotions were bottled up, until this encounter.

Ladies, there is no reason to bury feelings because God will bring them to the surface at random times.  Your best bet is to forgive ASAP because you never know how many blessings you miss harboring unknown negativity.  Ironically, after signing our peace treaty I have yet to hear from him. I believe I passed the test this time for sure. I accepted the facebook request but more important, I sincerely accepted his apology.

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for revealing repressed feelings to me.  There are so many ways the enemy attacks that I may not catch them all but You are there to get me back on track.  Lord, thank You for being my magnifying lens and focusing in on things that drive a wedge between us.  I am far from perfect but You still love me! I pray for the ability to forgive and the strength to do so no matter what just as You have done for me so many times before.  In Jesus’ Name, AMEN!

I challenge you to take a moment and EMPOWER yourself to forgive all of it… all the pain, confusion, misunderstanding, heart breaks, turmoil, and stress caused by others! If Jesus can do it daily with each of us, I know we are just as capable!!!  Be Blessed Ladies!!!

Ms. Latasha Sampson is an accomplished writer who is currently pursuing her Masters Degree in Human Resources Management.  Her favorite scripture is “No weapon formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue which rises against you in judgment You shall condemn” Isaiah 54:17.

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9 thoughts on “Single In The City 4: The Test

  1. Whew, just like negativity, unforgiveness is a cancer too. Forgiving is so freeing. Not for them, but for you. I am also pleased that you shared the true intent of fasting, that it is for us, not for God.

    This post has so many embedded lessons in it. I’m sure I have to some forgiving to do in my heart and the physical realm. #workinprogress

    • Tell me about it Kay… unforgiveness can be hidden deep but cause a plague in your whole situation. When I started that fast for the first time it wasn’t for anything in particular but for me just find out the TRUE me and boy did it happen. God will give u what u ask for even when u don’t have a clue what u are looking for!

  2. Oooohhhh Latasha!! As I was reading your post, my ex boyfriend flashed right before my very eyes, and instantly I went into that mode…you know the “bet you’re missing me now, huh??; ….oh, so you finally realized “all of this” was good and you messed up when you traded me in for someone else, huh????” I had to check myself right on the spot! Had no idea reading your post would make me zoom into feelings I thought I had looong ago let loose and forgotten. I thank you for the scripture reminding us that when in prayer; forgive; so that our Father may also forgive us. Wheeww!! Forgiveness for this ex boyfriend is something I’m working on ASAP, don’t want those negative, hostile vibes in my spirit; only God dwells in there. Have a blessed weekend my sister!! God bless you!

    • Dee. I am so happy that you can relate. I had really convinced myself that I had forgiven him but when given that moment to confront him I took it and ran with it. The thing is that the deeper we go in God the more loose ends we will be required to tie up before elevation to the next level. He has to know for certain that we have handle things the best way… HIS way… FORGIVENESS!!! B Blessed!

  3. Tasha this em was great! I’m so glad God allowed you to be bold and write this word. I’m married and I’m happy but you made me realize I never forgave my ex. Girl if someone mentions his name I cringe. You helped me realize that I have to forgive him because God says so, not because I want to. I’m obedient to the word so thanks girl!

    • Keviyona AKA Sheka :)….. I believe that is why God told me to write this. As women we have the tendency to just move on and never look back. At that point we force ourselves to believe that we have forgiven when we were only hoping to forget. Just as our God is one of decency and order, the same is required of you; therefore we must finish what we started CORRECTLY!!! Go ahead and take the test again… I’m certain you will pass this time around!

  4. Latasha I exhale as I write this. Like Kay said there are many lessons …the two I hold on to are forgiveness and letting some things remain in the past…even when temptation arises. Thank you for this word.

    • I’m glad you were blessed by it. I thought my learning was over when my fast ended but God had so many more lessons to teach me that I was not even prepared. Thankfully, I passed the test and God got the glory then and now!

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