“You are going to be who God uses to save the rest of your family! You are not doing enough to lead your family to Jesus! Whatever is holding you back, whether its bitterness or something else, is keeping some of your family members from salvation. If some of your family members go to hell, that blood will be on your hands!” As my God Sister spoke this word to me, I just rolled my eyes! Here we go again!!
REALLY GOD?! Are You seriously putting that kind of responsibility on me? I’m good where I am! I like my life; I have everything I need and most of the things I want. I finally can say “…for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances…” (Philippians 4:11 NIV) and You put THIS on me? You just couldn’t let me be content, huh? You ALWAYS have to stretch me, push me out of my comfort zone, and give me SOMETHING ELSE to do!!
You told me to leave the church I had grown up in where everyone knew me, where I was celebrated, and my pastor knew me by name and sent me to a church of over 5,000 members. This church was almost the exact opposite of all that I knew but as soon as I got my bearings HERE WE GO AGAIN…
My money started getting funny and You said, “Tithe out of your need. Pay your tithes, even if that makes you short on your bills.” Really God?! BUT I did it and as SOON as I got kind of comfortable, HERE WE GO AGAIN…
The smack down really hit when You started messing with my relationships. I’ve ALWAYS had a boyfriend, a boo or something but You said “…avoid sexual immorality…” so I began to live a celibate lifestyle and God You KNOW how hard this has been for me. But God that wasn’t enough; You then said, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers…” (II Corinthians 6:14 NIV) So now, not only am I not having sex, but I’m not even dating because unfortunately it’s slim pickings among men who are REALLY saved and striving to live for God. However, I did it because I trust that Your will is what’s best and I KNOW my destiny and destination is way beyond what I can ask or think. But God with all due respect, I do NOT like this route!
After much fighting and even now as I continue to struggle, I have finally reached a level of contentment and submission to God’s will, really believing that God is pleased with my life and HERE WE GO AGAIN!! What do You want me to do with my unsaved family members? When I go around them I feel like they are giving me the stank eye and saying, “Well who does she think she is? Isn’t that Charlotte’s daughter? Isn’t she the one that was always trying to hang and follow us around?” Even Jesus said, “Only in his hometown and in his own house is a prophet without honor…” (Matthew 13:57 NIV) I don’t think I’m going to be able to do this one God. Where would I even begin? We only see each other at holidays, if that!
So you’re going to give up your destiny NOW because you feel like this is impossible? Yes, you’re right; by yourself you can’t do this! But have I ever left you? Was I not there when you left the church you grew up in and went to New Life? Did I not see you through your struggles? You are stronger spiritually now than you have EVER been! Everything in your spiritual walk has gone to the next level: your worship, your prayer life and your understanding of my word! You’re going to stop now?!
Was I not there with you as you struggled financially? Did I not make a way for all your bills to get paid? Did I keep your car from being repossessed? Did you ever have a night that you didn’t have a roof over your head and a safe and warm place to sleep? Did I not send people to bless you throughout your time of lack? You are more financially stable now than you have EVER been! You are saving, you can purchase extras and your refrigerator and pantry is full! Are you really going to give up now?!
Was I not there during your bouts with loneliness and depression? Did I not replace the severed relationships with divine connections that speak life into you, push you toward your destiny in me, and give you just as much if not more than you give to them? Am I not specifically preparing you to one day be a wife and mother? Did I not cover you while you were out there? Have you ever been pregnant? Do you have any diseases? Did I not restore you, heal your broken hearts? Did I not break EVERY soul tie? Are you serious?! Are you really going to give up now?!
Are you really starting to doubt me now? “Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh, is there anything too hard for me?” (Jeremiah 32:27 NIV)
*Disclaimer: This was not the EmpowerMoment that I intended to write; God literally started speaking to me in the midst of my writing. After all of that, all I can say is CHECKED!!
Please forgive me! I ask that You also forgive any woman reading this who is or has gotten irritated with You for doing exactly what You strive to do: make us more and more like You. Help us to understand that we are not to compare ourselves to other Christians but to You and humble us to know that we have NOT “arrived.” There is and will ALWAYS be another task we must complete for the building of Your kingdom and another area we must grow in so our victory and growth can bring glory to You. We thank You for loving us SO much that You spend the time and effort to keep stretching us and pulling us out of our comfort zone. We ask that you never let us go. In Jesus’ Name Amen!
Ladies, today I EMPOWER you to submit to what God is calling you to do, no matter how uncomfortable it makes you. I am truly a witness that He will not only sustain you throughout the process but there is truly a blessing in obedience. There is a song that the praise team at my church sings that simply says: “I surrender, I open up my heart to whatever You desire.” Let this be what you say to God today!
Ms. Katrina Richard is an up and coming professional residing in Chicago, Illinois. She strives to incorporate knowledge and life-skills to teenagers in her profession as a high school history teacher. Katrina is very active in her church community where she serves in the prayer ministry as well as in the nursery. She has a passion for serving in the lesser known areas of ministry because she believes every facet of ministry is important to kingdom building and spiritual development of the believers. Her favorite scripture is Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”