People Pleaser: n. a person who spends a lot of energy pleasing others.
“I’m hungry could you get me something to eat?” YES… “I’m tired will go to the store for me?” YES… “It’s late but I really want to see you, will you come over?” YES… “Will you go shopping for me?” YES… “I have a bill due could you pay it for me?” YES
Hello my name is ______________ and I’m a people pleaser. For me, this is beyond familiar. If I tell someone NO, it is like disowning him or her. It seems that far-fetched to me. I say YES before I stop and evaluate my own needs or schedule. I may not feel passionate about the request, but I comply, mostly because I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings or make someone mad.
To be truthful, I seek validations of self-worth or value from others. But WHY? I say I am a Christian and I have accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior, but why do I/we choose people over our Father in Heaven? For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ. (Galatians 1:10 ESV)
So much time and energy is put into meeting the needs of others that I find myself losing touch with my own life, and my relationship with God suffers. We give man (men and women) too much credit, and we fear them instead of God. Proverbs 29.25 states that the fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trust in the Lord is safe. Isaiah 51:7 speaks truth when it says, ”Listen to me, you who know righteousness the people in whose heart is my law; fear not the reproach of man, nor be dismayed at their reveilings.” (ESV)
I discovered myself having a people pleasing personality a very long time ago. I pray to God for understanding on why I feel this way and through my prayers God is giving me daily knowledge and understanding that not everyone deserves my YES. Hold on and understand that whatever you do, work heartily as for the Lord and not for men. (Colossians 3:23 ESV)
I have let You down. I have looked for man’s validation over my life, but only Yours matters. Forgive me, God, for not pleasing You and going after Your heart. Thank You for the understanding to know that saying YES to man is not wrong, but pleasing man and putting man above You is wrong. I love You, Lord, for loving me as much as You do. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!
Ladies, I EMPOWER you to choose wisely who gets a YES from you. “Will you mediate on my word more?” YES…”Will you forgive your brothers and sisters who have forsaken you?” YES…”Will you go out into the world and tell people all about me?” YES…”Do you love me?” YESSSSSS! Hello my name is ________________ and I’m a God Pleaser!
Have you overcome “people pleasing?” Tell us what it took for you to make that transformation.
Read a related EmpowerMoment: I Am Free: The Ultimate People Pleaser
Ms. Hassanah White is a dedicated member of Faith Walkers Church in Birmingham, Alabama where their motto is to “Walk it out by Faith.” She also serves as a member of the Praise Dance Ministry. Hassanah is a true professional in the realm of marketing and customer service. She’s a proud mother of a very energetic little boy named Jaden. Hassanah believes laughter and prayer are the best medicines for any situation. Her favorite scripture is Hebrews 11:6: “And without Faith it is impossible to please GOD, because anyone who comes to Him must BELIEVE that He exists and that He REWARDS those who earnestly seek Him.”