Blessings, Honesty/Truth, Mentoring, Obedience

Set the Stage…

“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”  Matthew 6:33 KJV

I was talking to one of my mentees a few moments ago and she asked me about a situation with her and her boyfriend. She was upset and distraught because now that he was angry over something simple, she felt as though she couldn’t move into his apartment with him, which happens to be a few states away. I tried my best not to be so blunt, but I think that’s why she asked me for advice in the first place.

This was my actual instant message:

“To be honest, it doesn’t seem as though you are setting up things in your favor anyway. You have to set the stage for God to bless you; He won’t do that if you are staying with a man you aren’t married to. (Sorry, you know I’m straightforward.) God blesses obedience. This seems like such a simple issue for him to get mad over (a shirt), but sometimes God has to wake us up in order for us to see the big picture. You are worth too much to degrade yourself like that. #straightnochaser.”

Sometimes we don’t even realize that we are asking God to bless our mess. As I grow, I look back on my life and some of my old prayer journals and I either try to hide from God in embarrassment or laugh at the thought of me actually thinking God was going to bless my mess.

I remember dating a guy in college that I thought was a god. I am not kidding! I fell into the depths of compromise and even found myself compromising my beliefs, my spirituality, and even my comfort zone. It was just nothing good about it. I stumbled upon an old prayer journal, which had to be burned immediately, that spoke about asking God to bless our “union” and for us to have a prosperous life together. Looking back, I realize that I didn’t even set the stage right. We weren’t seeking God to guide our friendship. As a matter of fact, I think we ignored God.  We didn’t act in love (to be patient and kind), and instead acted in lust. His good looks drove me and not his heart. “Do not lust in your heart after her (his) beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes.” (Proverbs 6:25NIV) I flat out disobeyed this nugget of guidance.  I liked the way he talked and not the content of his conversation. I did not approach him with my standards, my love for God, and my seriousness about living a life pleasing to God. I did not use this scripture to strengthen me: “Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong.” (1 Corinthians 16:13 NIV) I didn’t set the stage right for God to bless that relationship. God’s word says, “Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” (Psalm 37:4 KJV)

I was not acting in obedience. “If they obey and serve him, they will spend the rest of their days in prosperity and their years in contentment.” (Job 36:11 NIV) How was He going to bless my mess?

As with all of my mentees, I uncovered myself and shared my mirrored past with her. I wasn’t trying to play the “you shacking so you are going to hell” card because that was not the point. The point was, you can’t expect God to pour out prosperity if you aren’t in position to serve and receive.

Dear Daddy,

Words cannot express the number of times Your mercy has spared me. Where I am today is only a testament to how You’ve carried me, forgiven me and loved me. My future rests in Your hands and as I strive to continue to be a woman after Your heart, please keep my mind and heart sensitive to Your direction.  I know that it’s only with You that I can make it to be what You’ve called me to be. Thank You for Your big eraser that has erased my past and given me a clean slate. (Isaiah 1:18 NIV) In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

Ladies, I EMPOWER you today to set the stage right! Check your situation. Make sure that the life you are asking God to lead has His stamp of approval and if you aren’t sure, then line it up with His word and see if it matches. If you still aren’t sure, then wait. The Lord will not steer you wrong. Sometimes waiting is the best option. “But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:31)

To my mentee,

Thank you for trusting me to give you advice in this matter, you could have picked anyone. Throughout our talk, I was confident that you knew the answer anyway and I am blessed to know that you felt empowered to continue to be “God’s Girl” after our chat. Thank you for letting me share our story. God’s got ya back. I know for a fact that you will be alright! God’s blessings to you on your first year in college!

Mrs. Lady K

As a professional, Mrs. Khalilah Burton is College Biology Instructor. She is also currently pursuing a Doctorate of Education in Higher Ed and Community College Leadership. Khalilah is passionate about her faith journey and uses this key scripture as her inspiration: “But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:31 KJV) She teaches Young Adult Bible Study and Sunday School and also serves as a guest speaker and panelist for various events for women and Christian empowerment.  Khalilah resides in Millbrook, Alabama with her wonderful husband Donald Burton, Jr. and their energetic three-year old daughter. They attend St. Luke Christian ChurchCheck out Khalilah’s Christian weight loss blog here.

21 thoughts on “Set the Stage…”

  1. A very timely word worth meditating on. I’m reminded of Phillippians 4:8, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.”

  2. Kay, I defnitely see the parallel between Monday’s EmpowerMoment and todays. What a great follow up (Funny thing is that I started to leave her a note at the end as well 🙂

    You are absolutely right…we have to set up the stage with the correct props and actors/actresses if we expect Him to bless us. He just doesnt bless mess!

    I love how you said compare it to the Word. If it doesnt line up with His word, it aint His will for your life. PERIOD.

  3. Excellent post!! Indeed we have to be careful and cognizant of what we are petitioning God for and be ready to accept his will being done because it doesn’t always align with our own personal plan or “vision”…good thing he’s in charge and knows best.

    1. Veronica, no it “usually” never aligns with our personal goals, lol. Which in the end, we are usually glad it ended up that way, just not in the midst. Thank you for your support and leaving a comment.

  4. Girl I was reading this earlier and thinking about that prayer journal and the requests you used to make to God. I am pretty sure we have ALL been there because I know I have. Thank God for growth. ….not that I don’t have mess on occasion but I know better that to involve God in it. Continuously a work in progress…

    I am glad that you were able to share wisdom with someone who very well needed guidance and not chastisement. Sometimes that’s a thin line to walk but you did it well. Continue to set the stage…

  5. Great post. I’ve been down that road.I’m in the process of setting the stage RIGHT. I wish the same for everyone that reads this empowermoment.

    1. Nothing like being a work in process……….so much better than “a mess in progress” lol. Stay in the fight, we all are.

      Thanks for reading, and for your encouragement.

  6. Thank you for talking with me and guiding me through that time when I felt I had no one else to talk too, glad to say that im currently not with him anymore and has moved on from that scenery. I do find myself crying at times because I do miss him but I know as times go on, God will bless me with his presence or bless me with someone else who will love me and respect me. You really changed my life with these words and im glad you took the time out to talk to me about my situation, cant hardly find someone like you that will actually sit down and explain what life and God has to bring you. Again I say thanks and a big thanks for leading me to this great site!

    Love, Mentee

    1. Keia the vast majority of women have been where you are…we all know that it’s often hard to let go but until you truly let go you can’t get to that “NEXT” that God has specially designed for you. I am glad that God brought Kay into your life and you are able to share with her. Continue to make decisions that are pleasing to God and although you may stumble sometimes (we all do) know that God is loving, just and able to forgive. Bless you…

    2. Hi “Mentee”!!! 🙂

      First off, thanks for your courage in posting a comment. Secondly, welcome to EmpowerMoments! Third, I just want to encourage you. Whatever you sacrifice for God and out of odedience, He replaces in due season. He is truly a rewarder of those that diligently seek Him. I too have been where you are and I know that you can feel cold, lonely and empty but find solace in His promises….His promise to never leave nor forsake you…His promise to comfort you…His promise to give you the desires of your heart…His promise to give you every good and perfect gift…His promise to LOVE YOU ALWAYS 🙂

      Blessings to you on your first year of school and we will be surely praying for you. Love you!!! 🙂

  7. Keia, I can definitely relate to what you feel. I’ve been there and have my struggles even now. What I have learned is that the right choice is RIGHT for you even when its hard. I try to take things one day at a time. I’m honest with God about how I feel and, like you, I have faith that God will restore all that I feel is lost. I constantly have to remind myself that God’s ways are not my ways and our timing is certainly not the same. But in the same way He reminds me that His love is not like mines. It’s greater! Trust that God loves you (and sees your tears). Remain faithful. He will reward you.

  8. Keia, first and most importantly you are a child of God, and he is a very jealousy God who wont’s your full attention. Time and space will heal all, you must stay in prayer about your life and in which direction you wont the Lord to lead you. Speak to the Lord as if he was your only friend. This thing we call life sometimes seems unfair and very hard and I’m not saying you will not struggle. God love’s you very much and only wont’s the best for you. When you get a chance go to Proverbs 31:10. Really read it in depth. You are going to be just fine. We all struggle and go through in life, but just remember when the Lord is on your side it doesn’t matter what the world say’s as long as God say’s yes! God bless you and may he keep you. Stay Faithful Keia and allow the Lord to guide your footsteps.

  9. Kay this post is powerful! By the way thanks for the title of my next sermon- “God don’t bless no mess!” Your post always bless me but this one is special because often times we do ask God to bless and fix things and people that are not even lined up wiht His word or His will. Thank you for reminding me of this scripture- “But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:31). I am not perfect and I too am a work in progress but I have learned to wait on the Lord because He will never leave you or forsake you!
    @Keia I am glad that God has an amazing, God fearing woman in your life and that can lead you the right way. God knows exactly what person or words to send to keep us from destruction. God bless you and remember the best is yet to come!

  10. Thanks to you all for those comforting words! Never thought so many could care about you and to help you through the hard times. He called my cell last night and asked me what have I learned from this break up and with all the anger that was in me that wanted to scream and yell i just talked to him peacefully and let him say what he needed to say. I feel as though I still need to move on and let him see that either he get with the program or this is the final decision and im not turning back. My mother is also a preacher in the A.M.E church and she helps me by talking to me and she knows my heart, my mother has guided me through so much and even stopped me from making the worst decision in my life which was moving in with him. I thank God for each and every one of you and I pray that he continues to bless and reward you for all you have done for me. And also this is my second year of college not first! 🙂
    Love, Mentee

  11. Keia, your new post further shows the strengthening you have already received. You weren’t stirred nor did you react in the manner which was expected of you. Continue to use this situation as a learning experience and walk into your destiny as promised. Doing things in line with his will is challenging but oh so rewarding. What a blessing that you have opened yourself up to listen and not always have to learn from experience, valuing those that plant seeds of prosperity into your life…what a fine quality, oftentimes I had to “bump” my head to learn. You are well on your way to excellence, keep striving and praying!!!

  12. Thanks again Lady K, aka my old Physical Science teacher! 🙂 Cant say thank you enough I have found a true family of God and now I can run here when I dont understand or have anyone to talk too. I will pray for each and everyone of youtonight and thank god for you! Thank you so much again you guys I really appreciate it.

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