Attitude, Conviction, Forgiveness, Growth/Maturity, Patience, She is Me Series, Speech

She is Me: Abigail

In honor of National Women’s History Month, EmpowerMoments is featuring a special week-long series called ‘She is Me’.  Each writer will parallel her own life with that of a Biblical woman to enlighten and EMPOWER you. Cheers to being a WOMAN!

The Fool And I

Abigail acted quickly. She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys. Then she told her servants, “Go on ahead; I’ll follow you.” But she did not tell her husband Nabal. (I Samuel 25: 18-19 NIV)

The Bible tells us that Abigail was married to Nabal, whose name literally means “fool”. How often have you had to deal with a fool? Someone who refused to listen to reason and instead marched head long into a situation you knew would lead to ruin? When this happens, how do you handle your emotions and words? Are you like Abigail, who waited until an opportune time (prompted by the Holy Spirit) before she spoke to her foolish husband?

I am currently dealing with someone who knows how to push every single button I have. I have never been closer to “losing my religion” than when dealing with this person. This individual has hurt me in ways that I can’t even explain. But due to their position in my life, I am unable to completely sever ties (like I usually do). One particular day last week, I had a speech all ready for this person. I  was going to tell them off good, but the opportunity never presented itself.  The Lord spoke to me and told me two things: 1) the conversation would not have been wise and 2) I need to work on extending grace.

The Bible admonishes us in Proverbs 4:7 Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom and with all thy getting get understanding(KJV) The Holy Spirit had me look up definitions for understanding and this is what I found:

Understanding: 1) Sympathetic, tolerant or wise towards people 2) Possessing judgment and intelligence 3)Having the ability to perceive or understand; keen discernment

When dealing with others (especially those that get under my skin), I must learn to be understanding (tolerant) of them. If I am honest with myself, I have not always been like Abigail. I am sure there are more times than I would like to admit that I have been more like Nabal, a fool. Had I gotten my way and had that conversation with that individual I would have said things that were not of God, emotions would have taken over and who knows where things would have gone. I thank God that He gave me time so I could let the Holy Spirit remove those thoughts from me. I sit here today free of any burden. Instead of “telling” that person off, I spoke to my Heavenly Father. In the end, Nabal was so overcome by the news that Abigail shared that he had a heart attack and died. Now, I am not wishing ill on anyone, but I will say that God will remove things from you. Either literally as in the death of Abigail’s husband or figuratively as in removing the anger you feel towards that person.

Whatever method God chooses to use, trust Him and do not try and take control of the situation.

Dear Daddy,

Thank You so much for loving me enough to give me examples of how a woman should behave. Allow the Holy Spirit to remove any embittered and battling spirit that may dwell within me. Help me to use words of wisdom and understanding when I speak to difficult people. When I am nearing frustration help me to remember how patient You are with me. Help me to learn to extend the same grace and mercy You have given to me. I understand I should not live like women of the world and allow my emotions to take over. I invite the Holy Spirit to dwell within me, so my words, thoughts and actions will line up with You. In Jesus Name, Amen!

Ladies, I EMPOWER you to trust God to handle the difficult people in your life start by extending them grace just as He has for you. 

Ms. Renee` N. Chaffin is a single mother who has a heart for helping those less fortunate. She has been active in the non-profit sector, whether through volunteerism or professionally, for the past six years.  She is passionate about sharing the love of God, her testimony and empowering people to discover their true potential that was bestowed on them by King of the Universe. Renee` is currently pursuing a Master’s in Public Administration. While on her pursuit of higher education, she is on a seven year journey to challenge God to do ‘exceedingly and abundantly above all she can imagine’ in seven areas over the next seven years. Check out her journey at Her favorite scripture is I Peter 5:6: “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.”