Restoration, Self Love

You Matter Too

“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?  You are not your own; you were bought at a price.  Therefore honor God with your bodies.” (1 Corinthians 6: 19-20 NIV)

Daughter, mother, sister, friend, teacher, worker, servant—MY GRACE—writer, author, nurturer, motivator, confidant—IS SUFFICIENT—laundry, school, dinner, homework, lessons, soccer practice, husband, relationships—FOR YOU—bills, budget, lack thereof, new tires, renew the tags, pay my taxes, field trips, insurance bill—MY POWER—tears, stress, anger, loneliness, weakness, letting go—IS MADE PERFECT—am I good enough, I don’t have time, I can’t do it, I don’t know where to start, I’m not smart enough, I’m not disciplined enough—IN YOUR WEAKNESS.

This is what runs through my head at times when I feel overwhelmed or have neglected to take a moment for myself.  I sit and think about all of my responsibilities and realize I’ve left something off.  ME!  Although I do not consider myself #1 in my life, I definitely consider myself a priority.  I made a decision a long time ago to not allow anyone to drain me because it never benefits me or the other person.  If I’m run-down, then my productivity will be inefficient.  If I’m angry, then I can’t love my loved ones at my optimal potential.

It’s so easy for us as women to think that being run down by our families is how we show our love for them, or that being selfless and putting our family first means neglecting ourselves. That’s the biggest myth we can tell ourselves.  When your daughter sees you exhausted and weighed down, she feels sorry for you, not empowered.  When your son sees you stressed out, he feels worried, not safe.  When your husband or boyfriend sees you out of sorts and unstable, he feels he’s to blame, as well as stressed and hopeless (men are burden bearers by nature).  We can’t solve all of life’s issues on our own, but we can take care of ourselves.  If you are feeling run-down, try a few of these things:

1. Take a bath daily…no matter the hour.  Lock the door and don’t let anyone in.  Sit in there and breathe, meditate, or even cry if you want to (even if it’s for nothing).

2. Take a walk/run daily…it’s free and everyone can do it.  Stop making excuses about your knees, back, ankles and time management.  If you walk to and from your car, you can walk up and down the street.

3. Get your hair done (or do it yourself) on a regular basis…I know that salon prices are not for everyone, but you can at least ensure you are maintaining your crown, even if it’s just to shampoo and condition it.

4. Paint your nails…either go to a shop or sit in a quiet place and paint them.  It has nothing to do with the outcome, but everything to do with forcing yourself to sit still for a moment.

5. Sit still...it’s a shame that some of us have to be told to sit still (myself included).  But take about 15 minutes each day to just sit, breathe, and meditate on God’s awesomeness in your life (not the wants…just His goodness).

I could go on and on about this, but here is my point.  Make yourself a priority!  Your family members and friends will thank you and you’ll be charged up to be able to be a better helper to those that need you.  Wearing yourself out for others is not benefiting anyone.  Your body is a temple for the Holy Spirit.  Are you taking care of your temple or are you allowing others, even if they have good intentions, to damage and break down your temple?

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for reminding me to STOP, breathe, and smell the roses.  I thank You for giving me the gift to nurture others, but please teach me how to maintain balance.  Help me to remember to take time out for me so that You can fill me with Your Spirit, recharge me with Your power, and revamp my mind to be about the things of Christ.  Thank You for reminding me that Your strength is made perfect in my weakness.  Help me to rely on that.  In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

Ladies, today I EMPOWER you to put yourself first for a moment and recharge!  Decide to take a moment out of each day that’s just for you.  When others see that you matter to yourself, you will matter even more to them!

What are some ways you take time out for yourself? Share with us below.

Read a related EmpowerMoment:  Quality Time

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As a professional, Mrs. Khalilah Burton is a College Biology Instructor. She is also currently pursuing a Doctorate of Education in Higher Ed and Community College Leadership. Khalilah is passionate about her faith journey and uses this key scripture as her inspiration: “But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:31 KJV) She and her husband serve as Co-Service leaders and Co-Group leaders of SustainedLove, which supports marriage get-a-ways from Family Life. Khalilah also serves as a guest speaker and panelist for various events for women and Christian empowerment. Khalilah resides in Millbrook, Alabama with her wonderful husband Donald Burton, Jr. and their two daughters. They attend Vaughn Forest Church. Check out Khalilah’s Christian weight loss blog here.

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9 thoughts on “You Matter Too”

  1. Thanks Kay! People tell me all the time you need to sit still and take some time for yourself, help yourself before you try helping others because if you burned out they are not benefitting as well! This here reminds me again to put God first and take care of my responsibilities and family but do not forget myself!

  2. Kay interestingly enough this same message was the topic on the morning prayer call I am on at 5am. It couldn’t have come at a better time as I am definitely feeling fatigued.

  3. Amen!! I know I don’t now how to sit still sometimes..lol..I’m learning now to make myself a priority. Which is really hard for me to do because I’m a giver. I do put others before myself which is good because I’m selfless but at the same time bad because I put myself on the back burner..lol..I have to take care of myself first! =)

    1. Yes Venus, I’ve learned there has to be a balance. By nature I am also a giver. My first thought is always to help someone else. I had a life changing event to remind me to make sure I take time for me so that I can be the best giver God created me to be. Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts.

  4. Hallelujah !!! boy do i remember…neglecting myself until i was practically at a mental breakdown!! that incident taught me…as much as i can do i am still not superwoman! i was actually threatening the safety and security of those i loved most. I fooled myself to think that because I was doing Gods work i had to push myself that far. But bless be to my God as I layed there in my bed He quietly spoke to me that he did not direct me to do all that i was doing.
    I grew alot that day and have been much happier since.

  5. Wow! I was not able to sit still long enough to read and digest this on Monday (pretty ironic huh?) but I just read it and it was sooooooo timely! I had a ton of phone calls to make for other family members and after the last one I was so frustrated I wanted to cry but couldnt find the tears. I just might take a bath and paint my toes tonight! Thanks for the reminder Kay!

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