Black Music Month Series: You Can’t Be The Man!

Happy New Year from the EmpowerMoments Team! To allow our team time to enjoy our families, we will be on winter break until February 4, 2013. In the meantime, you will be able to catch up on some of our favorite EmpowerMoments’ series. This week we are featuring our favorite posts from the Black Music Month series. Have a blessed week!

I can’t lie, when I first got this Fantasia CD, I would often listen to track three, ‘Man of The House’ on full blast, and often on repeat.  It was a bit of an anthem, because I could definitely relate to some of the lyrics (and I convinced myself that I could sing them pretty well too).

The chorus of the song goes like this:

(If you gone) be the man,
then be the man,
cause if you can’t
Baby I can,
I can and I will so
figure it out.
Which one of us gone be the man of the house?

Yes, Tiffany was in the car and on the treadmill singing to her man to be, that if he can’t be the man, she can! One day God said, really?! Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. (Ephesians 5:22-24 NIV) The Bible calls us to be submissive to our husbands and allow them to have the lead role! According to the Word, there is nothing to figure out!  No Tiffany, you can’t be the man!

That’s just a little bit of the independent, don’t need a man anthem that I was in love with! The first verse:

 If we don’t got it, I’ll go get it (it ain’t a thang)
And if it’s broken, I’ll fix it (I don’t complain)
But now see it’s gettin’ a little out of hand,
Cooking, cleaning, providing taking care of little man
You want to talk about who’s wearing the pants
Baby, well I don’t understand

Since I am single right now, this verse is very descriptive of my life. I am sole provider for my boys and myself, cooking, cleaning, fixing, and anything else that needs done.  However, the role of a single woman and one with a husband (or man as Fantasia refers to him) are very different.  “Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” (Titus 2:4-5 NIV) How can we expect our husbands to assume their responsibility when we are not willing to let them? Society, the media, and those around us constantly encourage us to be strong, independent, and not need a man, and then we are left to wonder why we are still single.  We can’t allow such trivial things to weigh so heavily on the way we live our lives as women of God! You can’t be the man!

The Word is clear on the role of the ‘Man of the House’ as well. Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of fullrespect. (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)  (1 Timothy 3:3-5 NIV) We have to be careful of who we assign this role. If God doesn’t have His hand on him we could be left confused, as Fantasia is in the song!

I still love the song, though I know that its meaning isn’t as literal for me as it had been at one time, because I recognize that I can’t be the man!

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for the gift of discernment and understanding through Your word.  I thank You for the strength to be all that I need to be for my family while I don’t have a husband in the physical realm.  Please prepare me for the husband that You will bless me with if/when You see fit, and mold me into the woman that will allow him to be the Man of the House that You call him to be. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

Ladies, today I EMPOWER you to let the man be a man! Whether you or single or married, allow the men in your life to take on the role that God has called them into, by being careful that you are only taking on the one that He has called you to.

As you listen to Fantasia’s ‘Man of the House’, remember who the REAL man of your house is!

**EmpowerMoments is looking for fresh talent in 2013. We currently have an array of openings available such as writers, marketers, recruiters, etc. If you are interested in learning how you can utilize your gifts for the empowering of women worldwide, please send an email to admin@empowermoments.org.   Please include your name, best contact number and email, and a brief snippet about yourself. If you promised God that you would do more for Him in 2013, this is the perfect opportunity to fulfill that promise! God truly has need for you!**


Ms. Tiffany Huff is the devoted mother of two boys, a blogger, lover of food and travel, and aspiring entrepreneur with a passion for helping others live out their purposes. She is looking forward to growing in her walk and honoring God through sharing her EmpowerMoments. One of her meditation scriptures is Romans 12:2: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

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