Red Flags & Bad Company

This month is National Poetry Month and in honor and snaps of it, our EmpowerMoments will feature short poems relative to each writer’s topic.  So enjoy and be encouraged!

In the middle of February, I met a guy named “Jake” at my job. He was trying really hard to talk to me. He asked me for my number and I was reluctant at first to give it to him but I went on and gave it to him anyway. Everything between Jake & I was cool at first, but eventually we began to bump heads about various things. One of them was a discussion about my celibacy. He didn’t understand the reason why I’m celibate. I tried explaining to him my journey regarding my celibacy but he didn’t get it.

There were a few times that Jake blew up at me in anger via phone over small things. The last blow-up was my final straw. I mentioned to Jake that I didn’t like his behavior and instead of receiving a sincere apology, Jake told me that he was sorry that I got the best of him. That was my cue to let him go. Towards the end of March, I decided to cut Jake off. I couldn’t deal with his negative behavior and short temper anymore. I felt that it was best for me to walk away from the situation.

When I told Jake about my decision, he didn’t take it well or me seriously. I eventually had to block Jake’s number on my phone and I know that I made the right decision to walk away. There were a few characteristics about Jake that I knew in the long run I couldn’t deal with such as his short temper, him not taking responsibility for his actions, and him always having the last word in an argument. Proverbs 22:24-25 MSG, states “Don’t hang out with angry people; don’t keep company with hotheads. Bad temper is contagious-don’t get infected.”

I’m learning as I get older, that it’s okay to walk away from people that are toxic and aren’t beneficial towards me. Do not be deceived:  “Bad company ruins good morals.” (1 Corinthians 15:33 ESV) There are friendships and romantic relationships in my past that lasted too long and should have been cut off fast. I wish that I had the strength, courage, and wisdom back then to walk away as soon as I saw the red flags. Sometimes, I struggle with letting people go and feeling a little guilt behind it. I have to remind myself that I’m not obligated to stick around. I have to do what’s in my best interest.

“It’s okay to walk away

It only takes for you to say

that you’ve had enough one day

All the negative people have to flee

Thank God that you’re finally free”

Dear Daddy,

Give me the courage to walk away from people that aren’t a good influence on me. Help me to use my discernment with people and help me to walk away from toxic relationships that do not bring You glory. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Ladies I EMPOWER you to watch out for the red flags in situations. If you don’t have peace about a person or a situation, ask God to give you the strength to move on. You’re not obligated to stay in a relationship or friendship(s) that are toxic.

What situations or people do you need to walk away from?


Venus Gilmore currently resides in Auburn, AL. She is an alumna of Auburn University. Venus has B.A. in Sociology with a concentration in Social Organization and Inequality with a minor in Social Work. She plans on pursuing a career in Social Services. She currently serves as the Mamie Reese Scholarship Director and College Transition Program Director of her sorority Theta Phi Sigma Christian Sorority, Inc. Venus is also a blogger for Radical7even. She is an active Client Advocate volunteer for the Women’s Hope Medical Clinic. She successfully balances all of these responsibilities with her favorite scripture as motivation: “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” (Philippians 4:13)


2 thoughts on “Red Flags & Bad Company”

  1. Venus, I loved this! I’m in the same boat as you and it’s always interesting when you explain that to people. I’ve learn (it’s a personal decision that works for me) to not allow people to know unless I sense a strong connection and see potential. I too am in a season of just letting things go. It’s become very easy of me to walk away because I’ve just learned my worth (the hard way). Thanks so much for sharing your journey.

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