Notes From Me To Me

Life As You See It

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what would you say to your younger self.

Dear younger me,

I know that what you are going through seems really rough right now in these teenage years, and you think when you get a little older and on your own things will be better because you will be in control of every aspect. However, I’m here to tell you that that’s not how it works. You will learn that quickly. So take a deep breath and let’s talk about this thing called life.

  1. Your life will not turn out the way you want it to. I know that sounds cruel, especially since you have it all planned out. You have to remember, though, that, “You were bought at a price, do not become slaves of men.”(1 Corinthians 7:23 NIV). The world likes to be in control but you let your Heavenly Father be in control without resistance from you. This life you are trying to plan out doesn’t belong to you. It belongs to someone who is greater and has something better in mind. So pray and ask God what He wants to do with it. He has your best interest in mind and He’s the one who can make it turn out greater than you ever thought it could! Let it go honey so you can work on purpose. It will make everything easier.
  2. Change will become your new best friend. I know right now you are used to things going a certain way. You are in your comfort zone, but you can’t stay there. Change is going to happen when you least expect it so get ready now! The way you do that is by getting deep in the word of God. You are not too young. This is your guide on those days when you feel confused and don’t know where to go or what to do. His word will be a lamp to your feet and a light to your path. (Psalms 119: 105 NIV)
  3. Start saving money now!!! You are young so this is the perfect time to get your finances together. If you get this down now, you are going to be in a better position later. Instead of worrying about how you’re going to make it, you will be able to help someone else who is struggling. Save little by little and watch it grow! (Proverbs 13:11 NIV)
  4. Rejection is a part of life. You are going to feel broken. You are going to wonder why. Be encouraged though because God has not rejected you. He accepts your flaws and all and He will NEVER leave you! He loves you and always will. Your rejection will help you see a little of what God experiences when you reject Him. The pain that you will feel will help you grow in your relationship with Christ. It will also help you to learn to let go of what you cannot control. It may not feel like it but it is a beautiful process and you are going to come out better on the other side! (1 Peter 2:4-5 NIV)
  5. You are worth the wait! You will be tempted and you will want to give in sometimes but know it will be worth it. People who don’t understand will try to convince you otherwise and some people will try to deceive you. Be prepared. Stand firm on God’s word and know that He has something great waiting for you. Remember, “You were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:20 NIV) This is your preparing season so get your heart and mind right for when God transitions you. Trust me that you are dodging some bullets and will be so thankful later! “Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you. Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.” (Song of Solomon 8:4NIV) It may not happen when you want it but it will happen… day.
  6. Don’t be afraid. “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline.” (2 Timothy 1:7 NIV) Watch who you listen to, the music you hear, and the things you watch. The spirit of fear is everywhere and will try to take over every aspect of your life. Don’t let it. It shows lack of faith and trust in God and also will keep you from so many blessings God has for you to share with others. Be bold for God. It looks great on you!

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for walking through this journey called life with me. Help me to remember that You have already mapped it out for me, and if I study Your word, I will know what to do. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Ladies, I EMPOWER you to let go and give your life to God in every aspect. He has a brilliant plan in place. If you get on board with Him, you will see all He has in store for you. He loves you more than anyone ever could and He will always make sure you are taken care of, so trust him!


Misha White currently resides in Daphne, AL and is a recent graduate of Tennessee State University with a Bachelor’s of Science Degree in Biology. She aspires to serve women to achieve the best spiritual and physical health possible using the Word of God, regular exercise, and healthy eating habits. She is a loving friend, sister, and daughter. One of her favorite scriptures is John 16:33 (NIV), “I have told  you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Notes From Me To Me

Dear Me…The New Wife

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what would you say to your younger self.

Dear Me…the New Wife,

What a beautiful wedding!!! And now for the real stuff, the stuff I wish you knew before you said “I do.”

  1. Really, really, really take a long look at his imperfections and then remember yours. This man is imperfect just like you. While I know you see a greater man in him, don’t deny the flaws he has today and try to “change” him. There is a difference between tolerance and acceptance. Now is the time to put this into action. You cannot tolerate those imperfections because tolerance has a point where it becomes intolerance. You have to ACCEPT them. Paraphrasing from John 8:7, Jesus said, He who is without sin cast the first stone! This scripture will save your marriage from some of the battles that are coming. Further, this is what it means to love and not be self-seeking. Understanding this was the toughest pill I had to swallow, but it will get you to a better place with him sooner than later. You’ll thank me for it.
  2. Pause! This word, phrase, verb, whatever you want to call it will save you and your new husband a lot of heart ache. Don’t be so quick to respond, quick to anger, or even quick to judge. Remember this, “A soft answer turns away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.” (Proverbs 15:1 KJV) You have a characteristic that in many cases, down the road, will be used for your good, but you have yet to learn how to refine this. Your quick tongue can literally kill your husband. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue; and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” (Proverbs 18:21 KJV) Think of it this way, a man’s ego is like bark on a tree. It is what protects him, what makes him strong, what helps to shield him from adverse external threats. Well, a nagging wife is like chipping away at that ego. It is like tearing off the bark of a tree. It doesn’t grow back so quickly and sometimes never. So be careful how quickly you “fire” back.
  3. Manipulation is NOT submission! Let’s remember, you are the one who chose to marry this man and you are the one who chose to follow God’s plan for your husband to the head and priest of your home. Don’t try to manipulate situations and circumstances to try and trick him into “following” your plans and ideas, and then act like you are submitting. Or worse, hiding things and decisions from him. Everything done in the dark comes to light and you don’t want the trust in your marriage to be strained because you don’t trust his judgment. That isn’t fair; you have to give him a chance. Trust freely, God ordained this marriage and this man to be your covering. To truly submit is to have an understanding that although you have these great ideas, you need to present them to him on the front end and ALLOW him to make the final decision, trusting he has your best interest at heart. Fast forwarding nine years from today, I can tell you, this will be one of the best things you can ever do!
  4. Throw the TV out of your bedroom…in your head. I don’t literally mean throw out your television, but I do mean throw out the thoughts in your head that you have seen or heard about what men like when it comes to intimacy. Have conversations about your husband’s preferences and likes before you start swinging from chandeliers because you thought that was how “it was supposed to go.” Learn how to love him. “Love is patient and kind,” (I Corinthians 13:4a NIV) That means love considers the thoughts of others.
  5. Finally, pray more for him. I think it is great that your marriage has a Godly foundation, but you two are going to come against some trials that will knock some of the most seasoned relationships off of their feet. Intimately learn how to pray for him. Have more conversations with God on how you can be a Godly wife and a Godly friend to him. The wisdom that God will give you early on will help you when the children come, when the moves occur, and when you have to sacrifice for things that are uncertain.

Your future is so rich with this man, trust me. Nine years in your future, I can tell you, it is going to be GOOD! But take heed to my advice, it will be even better than what I am witnessing right now…and that’s hard to beat!

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for the sanctity of marriage. Thank You for making it Holy, honorable, and a reflection of your love. Lord, I pray that You strengthen each wife, fiancée, girlfriend and lady in waiting with Godly wisdom on how to love, respect, and honor her husband. May You bless their conversations, their interactions, finances, love-making, their friends, and their children. Lord, teach us as wives how to be women after your own heart, how to pause and listen to the Holy Spirit and how to be a true helper to our husbands. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

Ladies, I EMPOWER you to include God in your marriage. This sounds so simple, yet is so hard to do. Marriage can reveal your true character, and for me, I found I wasn’t so great. But letting God into your heart and allowing Him to mold you as a wife will be the best thing you can do for your marriage. Check out more of my marriage posts here.


As a professional, Mrs. Khalilah Burton is a university administrator.  She is also currently pursuing a Doctorate of Education in Community College Leadership. Khalilah is passionate about her faith journey and uses this key scripture as her inspiration: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28 NIV) Khalilah also serves as a guest speaker and panelist for various events for women and Christian empowerment. Her passion for servant-hood is implemented through serving her community with Girl Scouts and her sorority, mentoring young women, and marriage empowerment. She resides in Daphne, Alabama with her wonderful husband Donald Burton, Jr. and their two daughters. Currently, they are seeking a  church home in their new city.

Notes From Me To Me

Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what you would say to your younger self.

Dear Fearfully and Wonderfully Made,

I have read your journals young lady. I have heard your cries. I have seen you shrink back because of fear and intimidation. I know you were depressed and even attempted to swallow down a bottle of pills to end your inward pain. But what you will soon realize is that there is someone you decided to accept in your life and as your life who will carry you throughout the storms and your fears, and lead you to strength, precious moments, and your destiny. So keep living and take one day at a time.You are going to learn patience and you are going to learn how to navigate through your fears and the devil’s intimidation.

Oh, keep writing! That is a God-given talent and God will use that talent as well as your sensitivity to encourage and help others. You were called weak and you were even made to feel not beautiful, overlooked, and like you could not survive life. But God, who promised He would be your dad and fill that void of not having a father, will help you get through it all. He will also help you to see yourself the way He sees you. Child, you are FIERCE, and you haven’t even realized it yet!

I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are Thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. (Psalm 139:14 KJV)

There are some things I have learned that you too will learn. Just hold them dear and never forget them.

  • The devil is a liar. You already know who he is, but what you failed to realized is that he has been deceiving you all this time even during your time of depression. Girl, you are valuable to God, to His kingdom, and to your family. You are beautiful and some man would love to call you his wife one day. Even if you are weak, passive, too nice, you are going to realize that that is okay because you will be known for your strength and perseverance. Confused? It is okay to be nice, it is okay to be what they call weak, because He that is in you, is greater than he that is in the world, and therefore, you are strong.
  • Learn to say no, now, please! Your mom has been teaching you how to stand up for yourself and how to be much bolder. It’s hard to say no but God doesn’t require you to be a people-pleaser, just compassionate. Just say a simple, ‘Yes, I will,’ or ‘No, I won’t.’ Anything beyond this is from the evil one. (Mat 5:37 NLT) That simple. Your ability to let go of the fear of man and learn to say no will benefit your mental and physical state.  Worry and stressing over pleasing others can make you sick!
  • No one can steal your joy if you don’t let them and if you don’t nurse the offense. You have no problem treasuring the moments, great times and new ventures in your life, but you do give away your joy at the drop of a hat. You shut down and retreat back to your shell.  God says that offenses will come and to not be easily offended. Sounds easier said than done, but make up in your mind to not nurse the offense and let it go! Hold on to your joy! It is one of your most prized possessions.
  • Let go! Sometimes you unknowingly invite manipulative and worrisome people in your life. They will drain your strength like Dracula. God also will keep, thank God for His mercy, talking to you about surrendering every area of your life to Him. You are afraid to let go of every detail and put it in His hands. You will realize that you cannot do anything without Him.
  • Save emergency money! No explanation here; don’t do it and see what happens!
  • Treat yourself! Mom taught this to all you and your female relatives in the family. I think you the only one it will take a while to catch on. I know you love to do for others, but God says love others as you love yourself. Hmm, you missed the second part.
  • Date. Stop being scared. Mom always said a man is not going to just fall on the couch.  Your first love will break your heart, and although you will not lose heart to love again, you will procrastinate in getting back out there.
  • Don’t be afraid to enjoy your blessings. Sometimes jealous people will make you feel like you have to hide what God put in you or did for you. This will sadden you because you weren’t always confident and you lived in your inadequacies and fear, so now you are learning to appreciate yourself and your talents and gifts. You lift up others also and when someone else gets blessed, you rejoice. So why can’t people rejoice with you!  Don’t worry about it or try to find out why. Be sensitive towards their feelings and walk in love, but don’t be afraid to praise God for what He has done for you!
  • Allow God to renew your mind. Your old way of thinking and handling things will not suffice as you get older and grow spiritually. Your mind can be a war field if you don’t keep those thoughts in check and upload God’s Word and perspective even of yourself in it.
  • Trust God and laugh hysterically daily! No explanation needed; just do it!

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for showing me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Thank You that I was so valuable to You that Your only begotten Son took my place on the cross, and gave me life and that much more abundantly. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!

Ladies, today I EMPOWER you to know that you are fearfully and wonderfully made!  Know that God can use your past for the good of your future, and He has a blueprint already drafted for your destiny. Seek Him for it and trust Him!


Ms. Tannika Moore loves the Lord and loves to write! Besides writing poetry or editing written work for family and friends, she currently works for NEIU Educational Talent Search program, helping high school students prepare for college. She loves to build people up through God’s Word, encouragement, mentoring, support, and her writing. In 2014, Tannika published her first book, a book of her poetry, titled Setting The Captive Free. She  also launched her Christian clothing and apparel brand called Fruitful & Fabulous inspired by John 15:8. Her favorite scripture comes from Philippians 1:6, “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you shall perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Notes From Me To Me

Dear Me at Sixteen

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what you would say to your younger self.

You’re growing up to be a beautiful young lady.  I want you to know three very important things.  I wish I would’ve known this when I was your age, but life teaches us lessons. Before you learn those lessons, please do this for me.

  1. Trust God with all your heart
  2. Never choose to be 2nd
  3. Use your beautiful mind, and lead stop always being a follower

Proverbs 3:5 NLT: Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding

It’s easy for me to say this because at sixteen you think you have it all figured out, but you don’t.  When you trust God, He leads you to a place of peace. Trust Him more now, and when you’re older, it comes naturally.  God makes our path straight.  Seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take.  (Proverbs 3:6 NLT)  We’ve traveled some crooked roads, but when I lean and trust in Him He makes it all right.

You made me all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.  Thank you for making me so WONDERFULLY complex! Your workmanship is marvelous-how well I know it.  You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.  You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.  (Psalms 139: 13-16 NLT)

It’s not okay to share a man. It’s not okay to be his side piece.  It’s not okay to think you don’t deserve better.  It’s not okay to make excuses to why you’re #2.  God made you so fearfully and wonderfully, not afraid and mediocre.  You belong to a king, so act like Royalty.

Why do you care so much what other people think of you? Why do you not stand up for yourself, always following the crowd?  Never do things to appeal to people. Watch Out! Don’t do your good deeds publicly, to be admired by others, for you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven.  (Matthew6:1 NLT) It leads you down a path of unhappiness. Because you care more about their happiness than your own, this characteristic is one GOD gave you that seem to be a balancing act.  You love so hard and care so much you give until you can’t anymore.  That is ok, but remember, there is only one you.  Take care of her.

Dear Daddy,

You are so worthy.  Thank You for giving me a heart to trust You, giving me the mind to know my worth, and the strength to believe in myself.  I love You.  In Jesus’ Name, AMEN.

Ladies, I EMPOWER you to look back at the past and learn from it.  You are your biggest fan! Cheer for yourself. 🙂


Ms. Hassanah White is a dedicated member of Faith Walkers Church in Birmingham, Alabama where their motto is to “Walk it out by Faith.” She also serves as a member of the Praise Dance Ministry. Hassanah is a true professional in the realm of marketing and customer service. She’s a proud mother of a very energetic little boy named Jaden. Hassanah believes laughter and prayer are the best medicines for any situation. Her favorite scripture is Hebrews 11:6: “And without Faith it is impossible to please GOD, because anyone who comes to Him must BELIEVE that He exists and that He REWARDS those who earnestly seek Him.”


Notes From Me To Me

Take Care of You!

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what you would say to your younger self.

Dear Younger Me,

God made you special. You’ve always been an old soul and sometimes wise beyond your years. You’ve also been naive and sometimes compromising to your own detriment. It was important to you to be liked by EVERYBODY. You didn’t know that that is unrealistic and impossible. You went out of your way to make others happy even at the expense of yourself. You didn’t realize that’s not how life should be.

 See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. (Colossians 2:8 ESV)

You shouldn’t sacrifice yourself for the sake of not wanting to hurt others feelings. Not that you should intentionally hurt people but you shouldn’t live in misery or discomfort for fear that someone will be so broken up because of you; because you said no, because you said later, because you said maybe, because you said you didn’t want to. It’s really not all about you! You didn’t know that then. You can’t be everything to everybody. They may be upset but these things will pass and you both will be better off in the long run. You will get over it and so will they. The same God who is able to sustain you is able to sustain them.

You are taking things too far by compromising yourself, your values and your peace of mind by holding on to what should have been dissolved a long time ago or in some cases never even entertained in the first place. John 16:33 says “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” Just because he tells you he is so smitten with you and that you’re playing hard to get doesn’t mean you have to entertain him for fear of hurting his feelings or because you feel sorry for him. I mean really, who made you a martyr for mankind! I know you were raised to be kind and considerate to everyone and to treat others with humility. However, you can’t be held responsible for the actions or thoughts of others especially if you’re being true to yourself and you aren’t being malicious.

You were not made to be everybody’s friend and everybody is not going to like you. Everybody is not going to be a true friend to you as you are to them. Realize that’s a part of life, grow from it and let her go. Friends don’t treat you nice one moment and mistreat you the next. That is not a friendship.

Nobody has the ability to be perfect, only God. Stop being obsessed with perfection! That’s too much pressure and besides you are only a teenager. You will be the best at some things but you can’t be the best at everything. There is nothing wrong with that. Give yourself a break. Sure, your parents expect you to do your best and be your best but they do understand you aren’t perfect nor can you be. You didn’t get to accomplish all you wanted to during your school years but look at what you did accomplish and be appreciative.

Jeremiah 29:11 says “For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” For this I am truly thankful!

Love Always,

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for protecting me from myself and my antics. Thank You for showing me I can’t carry everyone’s burdens but You can. Thank You for delivering me from being overly compromising and too self-sacrificial. Thank You for making me perfectly imperfect. In Jesus Name, Amen.

 I EMPOWER you to be confident in who you are and who God says you are! I EMPOWER you not to bear the weight of the world on your shoulders! I EMPOWER you to embrace your strengths and not get hung up on your weaknesses! I EMPOWER you to draw the line between compromise and self-demise. I EMPOWER you to think about yourself as well as others! I empower you to be YOU!


Mrs. Coretta Collins is a wife and mother who enjoys reading, writing, movies and spending time with family and friends. She is avid about health, healing and helping which serves her well as a Family Nurse Practitioner in a hematology and oncology practice. Striving to be led by the Lord throughout life and having overcome significant challenges, her favorite scripture is Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Coretta is a member of St. John A.M.E. Church in Birmingham, Alabama. She resides in Calera, Alabama with her awesome husband and two wonderful sons.

Notes From Me To Me

Dear Teenage Me

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what would you say to your younger self.

Has your mother ever told you, “If I knew then what I know now, I would not have made the mistakes that I made?” Well that’s only part of my story. There were mistakes I made that shaped me into the woman I am today and there are mistakes that could have been avoided. Regardless if I should or shouldn’t have made the mistakes, I cannot turn back the hands of time. Your teenage years were full of excitement and trouble.

At 15, you didn’t tell our parents the truth about where you were going and ended up in a house with a bunch of older guys that you didn’t know. “My friend,” who you were with left and went with her boyfriend. There were so many thoughts going through your mind- “What if they rape me? What if they drug me? What if they kill me?” At one point, you felt as if they all were surrounding you trying to see which one would have their way with you first. Of course, you couldn’t call anyone because you wasn’t where you said you were going. Oh, but who knew God had His hands on you even then. One of the young guys told the others to leave you alone and just let you leave. Needless to say, you left and never returned. That was the day you learned to never let someone leave you somewhere you may feel threatened and always tell someone where you are going. For He will command His angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways. (Psalms 91:11, ESV)

You always saw yourself as a leader. “I make my own decisions and I do stuff because I want to,” you say. Remember, you went to the mall with some friends. You didn’t realize that you were a little naïve and sheltered, but you were. Who knew that our friends didn’t have any money and they got all the latest brands from the “five finger discount”. At first you were staying away from them but after the second trip to the car, you wanted in. You were so afraid you were shocked you didn’t get everybody locked up. Needless to say you tried stealing and ended up with mix match shoes and a shirt that was too small. You were so ashamed you kept the merchandise for a while as a reminder of how stupid it was to steal. That was the day you learned to have your own mind and never let others influence you to do things that you know could lead you in trouble. Also, be okay with being different, that’s how you were designed. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.(Romans 12: 2, ESV)

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for protecting me even when I didn’t realize I needed protecting. God, I thank You for covering me from dangers that were self- inflicted. I am grateful that You chose me and had plans for me even as a teenager. God, I pray that whoever is reading this is empowered to make better choices and to realize that they are special in Your sight. In Jesus Name, Amen

Ladies, I EMPOWER you to be okay with being different and not a part of the “in crowd”. I EMPOWER you to be the best you at all times because God has plans for you.


Keviyona Ray is an ordained minister and co-pastor in training of The Christ For All People International Church. She is passionate about sharing the word of God with everyone she encounters. As a professional, Keviyona is a teacher for Chicago Public Schools. She loves her ministry of teaching and changing children’s lives. She is a devoted wife and mother of a wonderful daughter. Two of her favorite scriptures are Jeremiah 1: 5: “Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations” and Proverbs 29:18: “Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.


Notes From Me To Me

So Much Life Ahead

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what would you say to your younger self.

Dear brilliant, beautiful you,

Lift your head up. I’m writing you this love letter from the other side to let you know that it gets better. There will be many decisions to make; however, some of the choices that you make over the next few years will have a profound impact on your life. College, career, men, friendships, money matters, family – decisions you make in these areas can completely change the trajectory. Don’t make permanent decisions for temporary situations. If you remember nothing else, please remember to seek God first. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:6 KJV

As life has shown, you were born grown and never had the chance to enjoy the true normalcy and innocence of childhood. At 16, it’s hard to deal with many things especially a grown woman’s body. It’s genetics and those ample breasts were given to you for good reason. Don’t let the teasing by young men and the yuckiness of old perverts make you change them. Don’t do it! So many other things will change that you will rue the day that you had a breast reduction. Right now, you are leaning on “health issues” but deep down I know that you just don’t want the attention that they bring. Remember, I know you. Believe me, if this is something that you want, you will want it when you are old enough to understand the repercussions of letting them change your body. Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself. Feel good knowing that each part of you was sculpted by a master sculptor. But now, O Lord, thou art our father; we are the clay, and thou our potter; and we all are the work of thy hand. Isaiah 64:8 KJV Every part of you is beautiful so love yourself more.

Because I know who you will become, here are some other words of wisdom that will help along the way, especially in your 20’s:

  • Learn to say NO without excuse, hesitation or explanation. It will save you time, money and heartache.
  • When doing for others, do things because you want to do them and not because you feel forced or that you “owe” anyone.
  • When dating, let people go when you realize it’s not what you want or need. Your time could be better used.
  • You will make some mistakes over and over and over again because you fail to learn the lesson. Get the lesson so that you don’t waste time repeating mistakes.
  • Accept your family for who they are and not who you want them to be. The only person that you can control is yourself. Stay out of the drama and let them sort their issues out.
  • Pay attention to your health. Little things can become big things.
  • Just do it! Procrastination will try to destroy many of your dreams and it will if you allow it to fester.
  • Seek excellence in all that you do.
  • Remember your relationship with God is paramount to everything.

As you grow older, you will become wiser but you will also feel vulnerable and insecure in areas of your life that you have tried to protect. Ask God for discernment and thank Him as he brings you out of each valley. Know that if you had no valleys you wouldn’t appreciate the peaks in your life. Thank Him for the rain as well as the sunshine because the rain will help you grow.

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for my life and the lessons that You have enabled me to learn. I appreciate the mountain peaks and the valleys because they have molded me into who I am today. Lord I know that I can’t change the past but let me be a vessel to reach someone who can learn from me. God I ask that You grant me a long, healthy and prosperous life. As I move forward, let me follow Your will and lean not unto my own understanding and desires. Thank You for the ability to reflect and reset. In Jesus’ name, Amen. 

Ladies, I EMPOWER you to not let your past dictate your future. Each day is a new day to get it right. What are the lessons that you learned yesterday that you could apply today? Embrace who you are right now. If you don’t like something, change it but don’t get stuck wallowing in self pity and misery. Live, laugh, and learn. There’s more life ahead.

Ms. Chancee` Lundy lives in Washington, DC and is a small business owner as she is the co-owner of Nspiregreen, LLC, an environmental consulting firm. She is also a dedicated daughter, sister, friend and community servant. She has used her gift of public speaking to lead workshops across the globe speaking to crowds as large as 10,000 people. Her guiding scriptures  are Philippians 4:11-13 “Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: everywhere and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me.
Notes From Me To Me

Dear Twenty Year Old Me

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what would you say to your younger self.

Dear Me…at 20,

I’m reaching you at your turning point. I know this guy seems like he is the very air that you breathe, and while I am not about to tell you to leave him because the heart break he is going to cause will cause you to know how to love the man of your dreams (I’ve seen how this will play out, trust me, it’s good), I do want to encourage you to do some things to enhance your future:

  1. Stop eating French fries. When you hit 30, your metabolism is going to change and you will be susceptible to diabetes. Type II Diabetes is real! You can lose your eye sight, the functionality of your limbs, and ultimately your life. I Corinthians 6:19-20 says, “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you received from God? You are not your own, you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies.” Your witness to non-believers will be weakened by being obese. In your case, it shows a sign of lack of self-control. Add rice and potatoes of other forms to this list too.
  2. Save more money!! At the age of 20, you should be learning what it means to be a good steward over your finances. No matter what job you have or how much income you receive, tithe FIRST, pay yourself second, and then save ALL of the rest. Prepare to buy your first house in cash! You can’t reach your full potential in the kingdom with debt. Dave Ramsey (go ahead and look him up) stated, “Imagine how the kingdom of God would be if the people of God were out of debt.” When you are in debt or don’t have extra resources, you can’t serve to your maximum potential. You have a heart to help those in need by furnishing houses, buying cars for others, groceries, schools, etc. But you can’t do that if your funds are limited. 1 Peter 4:10 NIV says, “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” All of your money from your job should not go to bills and personal expenses, you should have enough left over to serve others.
  3. Cherish all of the friends along your journey and understand early that God has charged you with the gift of confidence. Not confidence as in attitude, but being able to have people trust you with their secrets and issues. However, this does not mean that they are your “friends.” So don’t be surprised when they cry their heart and issues out to you but then don’t invite you to “hang out.” You are their friend, but they are not yours. Recognizing this now will save you a lot of heartache. God has placed you in their life to be an example of a Christian confidant. Don’t abuse it. Trust is very important.
  4. Wait for everything. Do not move fast. Remember the old saying, “haste makes waste.” You will save yourself a lot of trouble and taking your foot out of your mouth if you just wait. Waiting requires knowing God’s voice and when he says to move. You can only do this by learning how to be still in your spirit. Practice this DAILY! It will serve you well.
  5. And finally, do “it” because you can. Feed this to yourself, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure” – Marianne Williamson. Go ahead and complete that book you started and get that certification you didn’t think you really would use. Don’t talk yourself out of things. When God makes a way, take it and do it! He doesn’t call the equipped, He equips the called! Not only can you do all things through Christ who strengthens you, but if God is for us, who can be against us? Romans 8:31 NIV.

When you were 11, a preacher pulled you to the side and said, “You have a calling over your life.” And he was right! I don’t want you to change the sins, bad mistakes and decisions, you are doing now because these are the tools that God will use to make you who you are in your mid-thirties. This is what will make you wise beyond your years. But I want you to seize the opportunities I mentioned above. You will be further ahead than the older you whose writing you today. Keeping loving yourself, keep loving others, and be great!!

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for allowing me to reflect on my past so that I can refocus my today. Thank You for saving me, watching over me, and using the pain in my yesterday to make me wise and a follower after your heart. Lord, please use my lessons learned to help younger women, my daughters, nieces, sisters, cousins, and other young women how look up to me. Thank You for being my rock, my sword, and my shield.  You are worthy to be praised!

Women, I EMPOWER you to look at your yesterday. Use it to catapult you to a better Woman tomorrow.


As a professional, Mrs. Khalilah Burton is a university administrator.  She is also currently pursuing a Doctorate of Education in Community College Leadership. Khalilah is passionate about her faith journey and uses this key scripture as her inspiration: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28 NIV) Khalilah also serves as a guest speaker and panelist for various events for women and Christian empowerment. Her passion for servant-hood is implemented through serving her community with Girl Scouts and her sorority, mentoring young women, and marriage empowerment. She resides in Daphne, Alabama with her wonderful husband Donald Burton, Jr. and their two daughters. Currently, they are seeking a  church home in their new city.