Notes From Me To Me

Life As You See It

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what would you say to your younger self.

Dear younger me,

I know that what you are going through seems really rough right now in these teenage years, and you think when you get a little older and on your own things will be better because you will be in control of every aspect. However, I’m here to tell you that that’s not how it works. You will learn that quickly. So take a deep breath and let’s talk about this thing called life.

  1. Your life will not turn out the way you want it to. I know that sounds cruel, especially since you have it all planned out. You have to remember, though, that, “You were bought at a price, do not become slaves of men.”(1 Corinthians 7:23 NIV). The world likes to be in control but you let your Heavenly Father be in control without resistance from you. This life you are trying to plan out doesn’t belong to you. It belongs to someone who is greater and has something better in mind. So pray and ask God what He wants to do with it. He has your best interest in mind and He’s the one who can make it turn out greater than you ever thought it could! Let it go honey so you can work on purpose. It will make everything easier.
  2. Change will become your new best friend. I know right now you are used to things going a certain way. You are in your comfort zone, but you can’t stay there. Change is going to happen when you least expect it so get ready now! The way you do that is by getting deep in the word of God. You are not too young. This is your guide on those days when you feel confused and don’t know where to go or what to do. His word will be a lamp to your feet and a light to your path. (Psalms 119: 105 NIV)
  3. Start saving money now!!! You are young so this is the perfect time to get your finances together. If you get this down now, you are going to be in a better position later. Instead of worrying about how you’re going to make it, you will be able to help someone else who is struggling. Save little by little and watch it grow! (Proverbs 13:11 NIV)
  4. Rejection is a part of life. You are going to feel broken. You are going to wonder why. Be encouraged though because God has not rejected you. He accepts your flaws and all and He will NEVER leave you! He loves you and always will. Your rejection will help you see a little of what God experiences when you reject Him. The pain that you will feel will help you grow in your relationship with Christ. It will also help you to learn to let go of what you cannot control. It may not feel like it but it is a beautiful process and you are going to come out better on the other side! (1 Peter 2:4-5 NIV)
  5. You are worth the wait! You will be tempted and you will want to give in sometimes but know it will be worth it. People who don’t understand will try to convince you otherwise and some people will try to deceive you. Be prepared. Stand firm on God’s word and know that He has something great waiting for you. Remember, “You were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:20 NIV) This is your preparing season so get your heart and mind right for when God transitions you. Trust me that you are dodging some bullets and will be so thankful later! “Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you. Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.” (Song of Solomon 8:4NIV) It may not happen when you want it but it will happen…..one day.
  6. Don’t be afraid. “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline.” (2 Timothy 1:7 NIV) Watch who you listen to, the music you hear, and the things you watch. The spirit of fear is everywhere and will try to take over every aspect of your life. Don’t let it. It shows lack of faith and trust in God and also will keep you from so many blessings God has for you to share with others. Be bold for God. It looks great on you!

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for walking through this journey called life with me. Help me to remember that You have already mapped it out for me, and if I study Your word, I will know what to do. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Ladies, I EMPOWER you to let go and give your life to God in every aspect. He has a brilliant plan in place. If you get on board with Him, you will see all He has in store for you. He loves you more than anyone ever could and He will always make sure you are taken care of, so trust him!

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Misha White currently resides in Daphne, AL and is a recent graduate of Tennessee State University with a Bachelor’s of Science Degree in Biology. She aspires to serve women to achieve the best spiritual and physical health possible using the Word of God, regular exercise, and healthy eating habits. She is a loving friend, sister, and daughter. One of her favorite scriptures is John 16:33 (NIV), “I have told  you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Notes From Me To Me

Dear Me…The New Wife

In honor of Women’s Month, each writer will be writing our EmpowerMoments full of encouragement and lessons to our younger selves in a series titled Notes From Me To Me. Sit back and enjoy our reflections, and also think about what would you say to your younger self.

Dear Me…the New Wife,

What a beautiful wedding!!! And now for the real stuff, the stuff I wish you knew before you said “I do.”

  1. Really, really, really take a long look at his imperfections and then remember yours. This man is imperfect just like you. While I know you see a greater man in him, don’t deny the flaws he has today and try to “change” him. There is a difference between tolerance and acceptance. Now is the time to put this into action. You cannot tolerate those imperfections because tolerance has a point where it becomes intolerance. You have to ACCEPT them. Paraphrasing from John 8:7, Jesus said, He who is without sin cast the first stone! This scripture will save your marriage from some of the battles that are coming. Further, this is what it means to love and not be self-seeking. Understanding this was the toughest pill I had to swallow, but it will get you to a better place with him sooner than later. You’ll thank me for it.
  2. Pause! This word, phrase, verb, whatever you want to call it will save you and your new husband a lot of heart ache. Don’t be so quick to respond, quick to anger, or even quick to judge. Remember this, “A soft answer turns away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.” (Proverbs 15:1 KJV) You have a characteristic that in many cases, down the road, will be used for your good, but you have yet to learn how to refine this. Your quick tongue can literally kill your husband. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue; and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” (Proverbs 18:21 KJV) Think of it this way, a man’s ego is like bark on a tree. It is what protects him, what makes him strong, what helps to shield him from adverse external threats. Well, a nagging wife is like chipping away at that ego. It is like tearing off the bark of a tree. It doesn’t grow back so quickly and sometimes never. So be careful how quickly you “fire” back.
  3. Manipulation is NOT submission! Let’s remember, you are the one who chose to marry this man and you are the one who chose to follow God’s plan for your husband to the head and priest of your home. Don’t try to manipulate situations and circumstances to try and trick him into “following” your plans and ideas, and then act like you are submitting. Or worse, hiding things and decisions from him. Everything done in the dark comes to light and you don’t want the trust in your marriage to be strained because you don’t trust his judgment. That isn’t fair; you have to give him a chance. Trust freely, God ordained this marriage and this man to be your covering. To truly submit is to have an understanding that although you have these great ideas, you need to present them to him on the front end and ALLOW him to make the final decision, trusting he has your best interest at heart. Fast forwarding nine years from today, I can tell you, this will be one of the best things you can ever do!
  4. Throw the TV out of your bedroom…in your head. I don’t literally mean throw out your television, but I do mean throw out the thoughts in your head that you have seen or heard about what men like when it comes to intimacy. Have conversations about your husband’s preferences and likes before you start swinging from chandeliers because you thought that was how “it was supposed to go.” Learn how to love him. “Love is patient and kind,” (I Corinthians 13:4a NIV) That means love considers the thoughts of others.
  5. Finally, pray more for him. I think it is great that your marriage has a Godly foundation, but you two are going to come against some trials that will knock some of the most seasoned relationships off of their feet. Intimately learn how to pray for him. Have more conversations with God on how you can be a Godly wife and a Godly friend to him. The wisdom that God will give you early on will help you when the children come, when the moves occur, and when you have to sacrifice for things that are uncertain.

Your future is so rich with this man, trust me. Nine years in your future, I can tell you, it is going to be GOOD! But take heed to my advice, it will be even better than what I am witnessing right now…and that’s hard to beat!

Dear Daddy,

Thank You for the sanctity of marriage. Thank You for making it Holy, honorable, and a reflection of your love. Lord, I pray that You strengthen each wife, fiancée, girlfriend and lady in waiting with Godly wisdom on how to love, respect, and honor her husband. May You bless their conversations, their interactions, finances, love-making, their friends, and their children. Lord, teach us as wives how to be women after your own heart, how to pause and listen to the Holy Spirit and how to be a true helper to our husbands. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

Ladies, I EMPOWER you to include God in your marriage. This sounds so simple, yet is so hard to do. Marriage can reveal your true character, and for me, I found I wasn’t so great. But letting God into your heart and allowing Him to mold you as a wife will be the best thing you can do for your marriage. Check out more of my marriage posts here.

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As a professional, Mrs. Khalilah Burton is a university administrator.  She is also currently pursuing a Doctorate of Education in Community College Leadership. Khalilah is passionate about her faith journey and uses this key scripture as her inspiration: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28 NIV) Khalilah also serves as a guest speaker and panelist for various events for women and Christian empowerment. Her passion for servant-hood is implemented through serving her community with Girl Scouts and her sorority, mentoring young women, and marriage empowerment. She resides in Daphne, Alabama with her wonderful husband Donald Burton, Jr. and their two daughters. Currently, they are seeking a  church home in their new city.

Contests

What’s Up Wednesday: March Contest Reminder!

Everyone loves to win FREE stuff so be sure to participate! Come and join the winner’s circle!

win

In honor of National Women’s History Month, we decided to do an EmpowerMoments series title Notes From Me To Me.  If we could speak to our younger selves, what exhortation or instruction would we give?

As our EmpowerMoments writers share their notes, we want you to join in and share your notes to your younger selves as well as enter your name for a chance to win a $20 gift card and an awesome devotional!  In regards to your notes, please be brief and submit one or two sentences/lines.

**The fine print: Limit one entry per person. One random winner will be chosen by a random number generator from all entries. Although there will be one winner, all persons entering the contest are agreeing by entering the contest to allow us to share your notes via our Facebook page. Deadline to enter is March 31, 2015 at 11:59 pm. The winner will be notified on or around Friday, April 3, 2015. EmpowerMoments team members are ineligible to win prizes. For additional questions, please email contests@empowermoments.org.**

Contests

What’s Up Wednesday: March Contest

Everyone loves to win FREE stuff so be sure to participate! Come and join the winner’s circle!

win

In honor of National Women’s History Month, we decided to do an EmpowerMoments series title Notes From Me To Me.  If we could speak to our younger selves, what exhortation or instruction would we give?

As our EmpowerMoments writers share their notes, we want you to join in and share your notes to your younger selves as well as enter your name for a chance to win a $20 gift card and an awesome devotional!  In regards to your notes, please be brief and submit one or two sentences/lines.

**The fine print: Limit one entry per person. One random winner will be chosen by a random number generator from all entries. Although there will be one winner, all persons entering the contest are agreeing by entering the contest to allow us to share your notes via our Facebook page. Deadline to enter is March 31, 2015 at 11:59 pm. The winner will be notified on or around Friday, April 3, 2015. EmpowerMoments team members are ineligible to win prizes. For additional questions, please email contests@empowermoments.org.**